Valentine's Day - What's love got to do with it?

Valentine’s Day – Again!

Valentine’s Day is looming and whether we like it or not this is a time when the commercial world we live in we are reminded of our relationships and our relationship status.

Even if you someone that thinks that Valentine’s Day is a load of BS, let’s face it you cannot avoid seeing the shops filling up with love heart balloons, cards, gifts and larger than life images of happy (young) couples gazing into each other’s eyes.

As a therapist I ask myself what effect these images have on our subconscious minds. Perhaps we subconsciously drawn into reflecting on our relationships and internally enquiring as to how ‘it’ measures up? Or if we are single how do we feel on Valentine’s Day?

Valentine’s Day supposed to be a celebration of love. But how can you celebrate love if you are going through a divorce, or recovering from a ‘broken heart’.

Furthermore, what is love?

My favourite quote about love is taken from the Bible and can be found in 1 Corinthians 13 verse 4 -8. Here it is:

“Love suffers long and is kind, love does not envy, love does not parade itself, it is not puffed up. Love does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, and thinks no evil. Love does not rejoice in iniquity but rejoices in the truth, love bears all things, endures all things. Love never fails.”

According to Paul the apostle who wrote this, true love is selfless all the time. This definitation of love is a far cry from the highly commercialised performance we see on Valentine’s Day. It is far, far deeper. For after all, a dozen red roses and a candlelit dinner does not ‘prove’ true love. Being nice to your partner for one day does not really represent love. So why is it important that we feel we need to have those things?

I am amazed and amused by how many women (and men) measure their partner’s love for them by how much their partner spends on Valentine’s Day. Many even compare this on a scale with what their friends received. The delusion that the bigger the prezzie and the fuss they receive comes anywhere close to reality!

And what happens the rest of the year?

And what about the effect of all this commercial fuss on those who are on their own on Valentine’s Day?

There is no doubt that love is THE most beautiful and amazing thing in our lives. It is the best part of our humanity. Anything else, our wealth, beauty, material goods are in the shade when compared with true love. Let us learn how to celebrate love not just on Valentine’s Day but every day of the year.

Instead of focusing on material gifts that wither and die, give more of yourself. Give more of your time, more acts of kindness not just to your partner but to others around you. Appreciate the kindness and love that others extend towards you instead of taking it for granted. Instead of focusing on what you want and how you feel… really listen to your partner and learn how to empathise with how they feel.

And if you are single perhaps it’s time to give more of yourself to others.

Love has a wonderful way of growing. The more you feed it, the stronger it grows, and the more pleasure and happiness it will bring you. Furthermore, the more love you give, the more love you will receive. It is the ultimate win-win situation!

Until the next time,

Valentine's Day PS – Download my FREE Gift to you this Valentine’s Day… Click here and scroll to bottom of page for details